Name that movie:
What do you like better, Christmas or Wedding Season?
The answer would be, um, wedding season?
On Friday night, Priya and I were relaxing at home, watching Transformers on my laptop. As you can probably guess, there isn't much in the way of entertainment in a dry Indian village on a Friday night. Plus, I long ago depleted my stash of mini bottles. However, this weekend I didn't mind too much. With less than 10 days of work remaining, our days have been long and action- packed, so it was nice to have some down time on this quiet, crisp Friday evening.
About 45 minutes into the movie, we suddenly heard what sounded like a giant rave outside our front door. We quickly jumped up and went out to the porch to see what the commotion was. Directly in front of our house, in the middle of the street, was a huge parade, including at least 100 people, a truck with four large speakers, blaring Bollywood music, and a horse and carriage, decked out in neon lights. Inside the carriage was a young man, dressed in white and red, looking very solemn. At the front of the parade, there were fireworks illuminating the sky in our small village. Priya and I looked at each other in shock. We really couldn't believe what a wild event we were witnessing. But what was even more surprising was the fact that this was the third parade we've seen this month.
Here in India, we are in the midst of wedding season. And the parade we saw was part of the wedding ceremony. I find this quite fascinating and thought I would share a little about this festive season with you.
Yes, there is an entire season devoted to weddings, just as there is winter and monsoon season. Starting in late November and lasting until mid-March, wedding season in India brings roughly 40 million Indians currently living around the world back to their home country to celebrate the matrimony of friends and family. According to a recent news article, approximately 70,000 couples tie the knot each wedding season. There is a multi-billion rupee marriage industry in India, at present. India is the world' #1 consumer of gold, and the demand for gold, due to dowry, increases, significantly each November. Stationary designers, mehendi (henna) artists and photographers are in high demand all season. My village tailor, Kamlesh, says that everyone who works in his family-owned shop makes at least 14 new wedding sarees each day. And what's even more interesting is that banks, including the India National Bank, will regularly offer loans to families so they can afford to throw the wedding of the village.
Once a wedding has been planned, elaborate and intricately designed invitations are sent out. It's not unusual to invite the entire village to your son or daughter's wedding. At the wedding, which lasts three days, a feast of Indian thali (tons of different soups, sauces and vegetables) is served and everyone can dig in. The first night of the wedding consists of dancing, singing and various performances in the form of a talent show, put on for the bride and groom. The third night is the actual wedding. The groom is driven, in a parade, to the bride's house, where there is a ceremony welcoming the bride to come live with the groom's family. In the wedding Priya and I saw the other night, the groom was in a carriage. A few weeks ago we saw a groom in a white Land Rover, decorated with garlands of fresh flowers.
As most of you know, the majority of weddings in India are still arranged. As times have progressed, there are, however, more and more love marriages in which the couples will decide themselves. Also, as we have match.com, there are marriage arrangement websites, such as http://www.shaadi.com/index.php, in which you enter your caste, mother tongue, religion and a variety of other essential factors.
In arranged marriages, the parents of the young bride and groom will actually use the following criteria, when considering a match:
Values and personal expectations: should match (for instance, will the bride seek to build a professional career and pursue higher education)
Age: the groom is usually desired to be older but not by more than a few years
Looks and physical attributes: should be acceptable to the other; for brides, a lighter skin complexion is often preferred; for grooms, height is important and should be at least a few inches taller than the bride
Religion: should be same, and sometimes there is insistence that the sub-denomination should be the same as well
Caste, ethnicity and native language: usually desired to be the same or similar
Diet (veg/non-veg/alcohol/smoking): may differ only if acceptable to the other
Education: comparable educational levels, or the boy should be more educated than the girl
Profession: the profession should be acceptable to the other (the lifestyle implications are often discussed within the family, e.g. for doctors and civil servants)
Financial: The boy's current and future financial and income situation should be acceptable to the girl.
Astrological signs/attributes: should be compatible, if the two families believe in it
Family status: The financial strength and reputation of the family, including the professional and marital statuses of the siblings of the prospective partner.
My co-teacher, Ameeta, is in the process of being matched to a guy. It's interesting to hear from her about the process, but it's also sad. She currently has a boyfriend, but he doesn't meet the above criteria and both families have forbidden it. But, Ameeta has a positive attitude because she's accepted her fate.
Wedding crashing is totally acceptable here. What's another one or two people in a wedding ceremony 1000 people plus? Thankfully, I've been able to witness a few different wedding ceremonies from the comfort of my front porch. But, this week, I am attending a ceremony of a teacher's son and I can only imagine what's in store for me.
What do you like better, Christmas or Wedding Season?
The answer would be, um, wedding season?
On Friday night, Priya and I were relaxing at home, watching Transformers on my laptop. As you can probably guess, there isn't much in the way of entertainment in a dry Indian village on a Friday night. Plus, I long ago depleted my stash of mini bottles. However, this weekend I didn't mind too much. With less than 10 days of work remaining, our days have been long and action- packed, so it was nice to have some down time on this quiet, crisp Friday evening.
About 45 minutes into the movie, we suddenly heard what sounded like a giant rave outside our front door. We quickly jumped up and went out to the porch to see what the commotion was. Directly in front of our house, in the middle of the street, was a huge parade, including at least 100 people, a truck with four large speakers, blaring Bollywood music, and a horse and carriage, decked out in neon lights. Inside the carriage was a young man, dressed in white and red, looking very solemn. At the front of the parade, there were fireworks illuminating the sky in our small village. Priya and I looked at each other in shock. We really couldn't believe what a wild event we were witnessing. But what was even more surprising was the fact that this was the third parade we've seen this month.
Here in India, we are in the midst of wedding season. And the parade we saw was part of the wedding ceremony. I find this quite fascinating and thought I would share a little about this festive season with you.
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| Wedding henna |
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| A bride and groom in their wedding wear |
As most of you know, the majority of weddings in India are still arranged. As times have progressed, there are, however, more and more love marriages in which the couples will decide themselves. Also, as we have match.com, there are marriage arrangement websites, such as http://www.shaadi.com/index.php, in which you enter your caste, mother tongue, religion and a variety of other essential factors.
In arranged marriages, the parents of the young bride and groom will actually use the following criteria, when considering a match:
 |
| The groom in his carriage, outside of my house |
Wedding crashing is totally acceptable here. What's another one or two people in a wedding ceremony 1000 people plus? Thankfully, I've been able to witness a few different wedding ceremonies from the comfort of my front porch. But, this week, I am attending a ceremony of a teacher's son and I can only imagine what's in store for me.
